


Sunken Ship, Soaring Skies

by himbolovinghimbo



Category: Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (Cartoon 2018), Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - All Media Types
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M, Other, Past Relationship(s), implied depression
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-01
Updated: 2019-07-06
Packaged: 2020-05-31 13:27:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,073
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19426900
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/himbolovinghimbo/pseuds/himbolovinghimbo
Summary: Lou Jitsu has just recovered from Draxum's unexpected betrayal and is now wondering the New York Sewers with four stolen turtles.





	1. Wandering the Dark

Lou Jitsu wandered the empty sewers, trailing the walls with his clawed hands, unwilling to look any other direction except forward. His other hand rapped stained birdie lightly, holding four sleeping children inside. Lou couldn’t even bring himself to look at them, not out of resentment, but shame in his own failure to see the inevitable.

The night of the fire left him in a fit of rage, the hours afterward left him sobbing and broken. Several days have already passed and Lou Jitsu’s only emotion is nothing. He didn’t feel anything, he didn’t want to feel anything. Allowing his mixed emotions to get the better of him felt like it was letting Draxum win.

Lou didn’t even know where he was going, his absentmindedly walking around felt less like a desire to hide and more like an excuse to avoid thinking too much about… him. It was albeit a bit hard, Lou couldn’t ignore the silver fur growing on his once smooth body, nor could he ignore the naked, pink tail sometimes smacking the walls without much thought. In a way, Lou felt violated, his entire body altered and deformed for the sake of one yokai’s obsessive and destructive goal to wipe out people just like him. 

After the fire, he had put as much willpower as possible to fight back against the ooze’s sinister capabilities, but over time Lou felt his body weaken, letting the ooze slowly take him over. Wondering the lonely and filthy halls of the New York sewers didn’t help much.

“Pa…. P…”

Lou refused to look down at whichever fidgeting turtle was speaking to him, wanting to only focus on finding the safest spot to rest and finally relax his mind. His hand trailed the walls again, hoping to find some kind of entrance or secret compartment. The man had spent many miserable nights scrounging for food to feed all of them. Well, not for himself, he had been trained to not require food for weeks, the scraps of pizza crust and hot dog bread was to feed his frail… specimen. Calling them children was no problem, but calling them his children was just too much.

Try as he could, Lou couldn’t help but let his thoughts wander a bit, the sewers were simply too drab to stay focused on walking for long. How desperately did he want to be wrapped in a warm blanket, his only bit of clothing worth salvaging was being used to keep the reptiles warm. Or to be surrounded by adoring fans and loving groupies, or even that dreaded arena Draxum hated so plainly. 

Draxum.

Lou had tried his hardest to prevent any more thoughts of that miserable scientist, but the cold air and the somber atmosphere made it even harder for him to hide the emotion he had been trying his hardest to suppress.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------

“It’s cold,” Draxum bellowed, angrily tapping the walls of the arena.

“Of course it’s cold, you’re out in the cool open air!” Lou smiled.

Both he and Draxum agreed to having their date under the arena, thanks to Lou Jitsu’s unfortunate collar preventing him from leaving. Initially excited and eager to join the beloved champion on the date, Lou could see Draxum’s expression of disgust and frustration.

“An arena feels pretty stuffy when you got 20,000 yokai surrounding you huh,” Lou asked.

“Yes… A shame really,” Draxum muttered. He blinked awkwardly, hoping for Lou to find some solution to Draxum’s foolish decision to join in without any sort of proper clothing outside of the typical armor.

Lou cocked his head and smiled, “I got you covered big guy.”

Lou pulled his arms behind his head and removed the birdie, signalling Draxum to bend down a bit, he wrapped it around his neck, his hands lingering on his breastplate longer than intended. He backed away and stifled a laugh, trying to hide his amusement over Draxum’s goofy appearance. Wearing the menacing armor along with the comically undersized birdie.

“Better?” He asked, hoping that it could at least warm up his back.

“No. And you’re shivering,” Draxum said, his expression unchanging.

“I’m fine, I’m used to this stuff,” Lou joked.

“There’s a better way to warm us up you know,” Draxum sighed, removing the birdie. Lou watched his careful hands go from fidgeting with the costume to leading up to his chest. Lou struggled to suppress a moan as Draxum trailed his hands upward, gently grazing his collar bone, to his neck, to his cheek, to his chin. Holding it up gently, Draxum dipped his head lower and closed the gap between them.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------

Sweaty palms gripped the walls as Draxum explored Lou Jitsu’s body. Tight flesh pounding Lou bit his lip gently and pushed Draxum deeper, choking back a sob as Draxum’s powerful hips sped up.

Draxum’s large, clawed hands trailed up his chest and circled his most tender parts lightly, careful not to scratch any part of Lou he deemed the most sensitive. A soft hand pressed itself on Lou’s tear stained cheek, wiping them cautiously.

“Lou…” Draxum started.

“Don’t say anything stupid Draxum,” Lou smiled but unable to look Draxum in the eyes. “I just spent a lot of time here. It was fine ya know? My boss was pretty damn nice and I loved the fans… but… I missed junk like this.”

“Junk? Is that why you can’t look at me?” Draxum asked, his expression suddenly stone faced again.

“No! You’re the best Draxy,” Lou wrapped his arms around Draxum and kissed him gently. “I just… you’re not my first okay? I used to do this a lot--daily in fact!” Lou quickly added. “It’s all the same to me now.”

“I hope I’m at least good,” Draxum blushed, moving his hips once more.

“You’re perfect,” Lou side, resting his head in the crook of Draxum’s neck.

“You’re warm,” Draxum whispered back.

Lou simply hugged him tighter as a response

\-------------------------------------------------------- 

“Hello?”

That wasn’t from the children. A voice too low and rumbly to be the voice of anyone’s child. It was another human, an adult human.

“Shit,” Lou hissed under his breath, hoping the children didn’t hear him.

If he ran the man would probably chase after him, he as already at a decent running distance, pointing his light directly at him, but not close enough to get a good look at him. If he stayed the man might grow fearful and attack him and his children, so what could he do?

“Holy shit! You’re Lou Jitsu!” The human exclaimed, Lou watched his hands nervously shake in excitement upon meeting his idol.

“Yes I’m Lou Jitsu!” Lou smiled, suddenly feeling that charismatic wave of love and affection he hadn’t felt in days. Of course he wasn’t falling for the human, but he greatly missed the feeling of warmth and admiration he so desperately desired. “Now could you put the flashlight down, I can barely see anything.”

No response.

“Uh… hello?” Lou struggled to view the human past the blinding lighting. The flashlight was no longer shaking but there was an air of tension between them. Stepping forward, Lou asked, “Is something wrong-”

“Stay back freak!” the man exclaimed fearfully.

I should have ran.

“I don’t mean you any harm, man,” Lou sighed. “I’m just not feeling good-”

“Shut up! I know what you are!” The man’s voice was almost childish, raised to a higher octave the closer Lou stepped.

“You do?”

“Y-yeah! You’re one of those spirit demon aliens! My friend told me all about you!” the man’s voice was nearing a shriek, backing away slowly while his flashlight jittered again. “How dare you pretend to be the world’s greatest action star.”

With the flashlight waving about, Lou was able to get a decent view of the man… or well… boy. A rather fair skinned child, who looked to be about 15-17 years old, and riddled with acne. His sweated, matted black hair failed to hide the fear and confusion in his fearful brown eyes.

“Calm down,” Lou chirped. “I don’t want to hurt you, I just want to give my kids a nice home.”

My kids? These aren’t my kids!

“Y-your kids? What the hell are you talking about? Those are fucking turtles!” the man shouted, shuffling through his jacket.

“Watch your language man, come on,” Lou frowned.

“I-I’ll give you till the count of three, to get out of my sight… before I shoot,” 

“Before you what?”

A powerful blast was heard that Lou narrowly avoided, the sounds of gunfire echoed violently in his ears, and Lou struggled not to touch his bloodied cheek, burning hotly after the bullet grazed right by it. This was enough to wake up all the turtles sitting in Lou’s arms, crying and howling for some sort of comfort.

“W-what did you do?” The man cried.

“It’s what you did dumbass!” Lou hissed. “You woke them up!”

“Y-you c-can blame me all you want, but I won’t fall for your alien tricks! You won’t eat my human brain,” The man called out, holding up his gun again.

“I’d need to find a brain to eat first,” Lou growled. He needed to think fast, that man’s nervous posture didn’t worry him in the slightest, but his frenetic movements and nervous hands meant that missing Lou and aiming for the turtles was inevitable. Lou needed to find a way to ease up the situation and fast. “What are you doing down here?”

The boy was still pointing the gun at Lou, but Lou could see that his arms had relaxed a bit, “none of your business freak! Now die!”

“Aren’t your parents worried about you?” Lou quickly interjected. He was really putting his and the turtles life on the line by speaking to the child like this, one wrong misstep could lead to five corpses being found in the sewers. But Lou Jitsu was never known for playing it safe.

“They don’t even know I’m down here, and if they did, they wouldn’t care,” the boy’s arms refused to budge, keeping the gun aimed perfectly at Lou’s heart, but that sense of anxiety and fear slowly began to escape Lou.

“Why do you believe that they won’t care?” Lou asked.

“I called my stupid old man a shitton of names,” the teenager smirked. “Tried to get me to join his stupid fishing business. Like dad, we live in New York, we don’t need to fish!”

“So you ran away?” Lou asked, noticing the gun lowering itself.

“I consider it leaving the family business,” the teen hissed. He brushed his hair slightly. “I heard a bunch of cop cars from above, so I’m hiding down here.”

“Oh, so your parents do care huh?” Lou asked, shoving the box turtle back in his wraps.

“No they don’t! I’m just playing it safe,” the teenager retorted, lifting the gun again. “You can never be too careful.”

“You know, I ran away from my home before,” Lou grimaced. Somehow that was enough to make the child nearly drop the gun in shock.

“The great action star Lou Jitsu is a run away?” the boy said in shocked. “Wait, shit no, you’re just a freaky alien demon.”

“Just listen alright,” Lou said, patting the head of the feisty snapping turtle trying to bite at his fingers. “My parents wanted me to do something I considered stupid. They trained me since day one to face my expectations alone, but I had a feeling that it was all for nothing. So you know what I did in retaliation? Told them they were out of their minds and run away.” Lou looked over to his sad reflection of a beautiful man with terrifying animal limbs being shown back to him in a filthy puddle. “And I’ve never regretted anything more.”

That’s not true… I have greater regrets than that.

“Did they turn you into… that?” the boy asked, pointing to Lou’s pink fingers with his gun.

“No, someone forced this on me,” Lou responded solemnly.

Don’t think about him, don’t think about him!

“But I tried so damn hard to prove to my parents that their plans for me were so foolish that I kept making terrible decisions after terrible decisions for the sake of one upping them,” Lou said, cracking a slight smile. Despite everything, he couldn’t deny how much he enjoyed life as a dramatic action star and an esteemed gladiator. And maybe even...

Yes… even him.

“I get you don’t want to commit to this destiny your parents gave you, but running away and cursing at them isn’t worth it and fixes nothing,” Lou’s gaze softened, not even willing to stare directly in the boy’s eyes anymore. “Maybe you’ll meet some nice people, and have a fun time, but in the end. You’ll regret it. Especially for hurting so many people you pushed away.”

Lou had been so lost in his own memories, that he hadn’t noticed the boy had put the gun away minutes ago. Had the child been smarter, he could have taken advantage of Lou’s moment of vulnerability. The teenager however, was no longer interested in causing any harm, in fact Lou had already gotten the feeling that the poor boy had never used a gun in his life, only swinging it around from threats and self defense.

“Thanks Lou… demon spirit,” the boy muttered, his voice barely audible. “I’ll uh, leave you be… sorry.”

“It’s fine, you’re not the first person who pointed a gun to my face!” Lou laughed. He wasn’t lying, the last time he remembers having a firewarm pointed to his chest, was when he drunkenly broke into Tang Shen’s apartment looking for his own. “Just take care of yourself kid, and don’t be afraid to apologize to your parents.”

The boy nodded awkwardly and ran off, clearly too awkward to continue the conversation any further.

After 10 minutes had passed, Lou found himself alone in the silence again, with the occasional sounds of trucks and cars moving above him. Lou’s eager smile turned to a solemn frown, finding himself envying the young boy.

“Even after one stupid mistake, that kid can return to his family,” Lou whispered, his own voice shaking. “Who can I return to?”

Lou was sick of crying, he was tired of the angry, emptying feeling of pouring your heart and soul out in public. But he couldn’t help himself. He was tired, he was hungry, and worst of all. He was lonely. So desperate for some kind of warmth, some kind of love some kind of--

“PAPA!”

Lou blinked and looked around, “another kid?”

“PAPAAAAAAA!”

Lou looked downward, viewing the tiny green hands pulling at his skin. The soft cries of affection elicited from the young box turtle, desperately trying to climb further up on his clothes. Lou gently put his hand on the child’s head.

“Stop that, I’m not-”

“DADDY!!!”

“PAPA!!”

“BIG!!!”

The four turtles began to fidget aggressively in Lou’s in birdie, prompting the man to sit down and unwrap the children. The pancake like turtle was the only one who chose to roll around in his lap, snuggling close to the birdie, but the slider, box and snapping turtles were all climbing all over their half mutated father. Lou should have guessed these children would consider him their father, but speaking words was new to him. 

“Please stop calling me that, I’m not your father,” Lou grimaced. He didn’t even know if he was still going to stick with these children for long.

“PAPA!!!” the box turtle had managed to climb up to Lou’s neck and snuggled under his chin. Almost as quickly as he climbed up his bare skin, Lou could hear the gentle snores of the small child resting under him. Lou patted his shell confidently as the snapping turtle climbed down his leg. He wasn’t sure how to feel at the moment, perhaps these children had adopted human terminology while spending their years underground. Lou had remembered stealing some old french bread and listening to a young girl whining to her father about visiting six flags before caving in. 

“Daddy! Big!” the red slider cheered, poking at his abdomen.

“I’m hungry!” the snapping turtle whined.

The softshell failed to join his brothers in the cheering, but stared up at Lou with rather intense eyes.

“Got something to say kiddo?” Lou joked, he was waiting for their insistent yelling and pulling to cease soon. These turles tend to have sudden bursts of energy before falling asleep.

The softshell yawned softly before blinking slowly at the half mutant.

“Love you daddy.”

Lou’s eyes widen with shock, “what...what was that?”

“Love you papa!” the box turtle said drowsily.

“Love you papa aaa!!!” the ear slider quickly added, sliding back in Lou’s lap.

“I love you daddy!! Love you!!!!” the snapping turtle gleamed, nearly sliding off of Lou’s shoulders.

“Love me…” Lou mirrored their words. Taking the box turtle off his shoulders and pushing the snapping turtle back into his lap, he looked at the four children.

That’s right.

They’re just children.

His children.

“You love me?” Lou tilted his head to the side, cracking a soft smile when the boys mimicked his movements.

“LOVE!!!”

“LOVE U PAPA!”

“DADDY!”

“I LOVE YOU PAPA!! LOVE!”

The children attempted to climb Lou’s beaten body again, but the hero wouldn’t allow it this time, forgetting about how disturbing his rat claws looked while rubbing the boys head or how his tail wagged aggressively to the feeling of self worth and understanding he had long since expected to be unattainable.

“I…” Lou took a deep breath. He didn’t know these children, in fact, they’re the reason he’s like this. These small, defenseless turtles turned him into the half beast before them. And yet, Lou couldn’t hide it anymore. No longer did he desire the feelings of affection and love he had once received from the yokai scientist, or the groupies or even the millions of adoring fans. The love he so desperately desired was right where he needed. And the love the turtles so greatly deserved, was hovering over them, eyes glazed and cheeks flushed with emotion and warmth.

“I… I love you too.”


	2. Memories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Draxum runs through the many memories that stick with him the most: unfortunately all of them are Lou Jitsu

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is intended to be a sort of companion piece to the previous chapter, however it won’t start off right where the last fic left off so don’t worry

“I love you Draxum,”

Draxum blinked quickly, staring at the injured warrior as he fixed the wounds on his chest. A nasty snake yokai had bitten him and Lou needed to be rushed to Draxum’s care, thanks to Big Mama’s refusal to deal with him herself, believing that he’ll “tough it out”.

“I know. You already told me that,” Draxum spoke with a stiff expression.

For anyone else, such an open display of affection from the world’s most beloved warrior would be more than a dream come true. But for Draxum, it was heart wrenching. After Draxum had initially expressed his loving affections back at the hotel, he was expecting a sort of bond or intimate relationship. But Lou was still out partying with various yokai and getting into bed with whatever consenting adult came near him. 

Clearly “love” meant two different things to the both of them.

While upsetting, it did make a certain plan a lot easier to stomach

“No, I mean… I think I love love you,” Lou stared intently at Draxum, cutting into his thoughts. “Do you feel the same way?”

Draxum froze, thankful the venom had been dealt with lest his process move even slower. His mind was a sudden blank. 

Do I feel the same way? Or have these strong feelings long since escaped me?

“I said I love you and I still mean it,” Draxum said, refusing to provide a definitive answer

“But—“

“I said what I said Lou,” Draxum quickly interjected.

Draxum ignored Lou’s hurt gaze, not wanting to harm the warrior emotionally but feeling a slight bit of frustration that now was the time he was going to confess his genuine feelings for love.

And I was so close too.

——————————

Draxum held onto Lou’s whining, sweating body tightly, both of the men exhausted from such a physically demanding night. Draxum carefully traced Lou’s chest to see if he could get more reactions out of him, prompting Lou to bite his lip softly and lean into Draxum. As much as he hated the hotel, it was rather nice breaking into Big Mama’s suite to visit Lou.

“You’re pressing too hard,” Lou groaned.

“Sorry,” Draxum muttered, not easing up. His hands pursued lower, feeling up whatever he could. Lou’s perfectly designed black suit was left open for Draxum to graze and touch, both men so eager to lie in bed and do whatever they wanted to each other that they barely had enough time to remove all their clothes.

“Mmph are you?” Lou cocked his head to the side. “Because you’re pushing rather hard down there.”

Draxum, avoided his gaze, “there’s a lot more… excess down there.” Draxum wiped the sticky substance on the bed, a little embarrassed that he had spilled so much into Lou.

“There’s a nice way to clean that up you know,” Lou gave a sly grin.

Draxum found himself pushing harder at Lou’s pelvis, prompting the man to moan and lean forward. Gripping Draxum’s shoulders tightly, Lou leaned his head back and looked to the stars glowing brightly through the glass window.

“You know, I’ve fought in that arena so many times I’ve lost count… and yet… the sky never seemed to bore me,” Lou blankly started, as if trying to make sense of his menial comment.

“What an awful poem,” Draxum grimaced. 

“It’s not a poem,” Lou wrapped his arms around Draxum again and looked deeply in his sunken eyes. “You never bore me Draxum.”

Draxum leaned in to give the champion a brief kiss, but the feeling of soft, human skin touching his own pushed him deeper, shoving Lou further in that be. Slender fingers tracing the stained clothes before resting on his exposed chest, revealing something concerning that left Draxum distracted.

“Something on your mind Draxy?” Lou spoke in that sometimes childish voice of his.

Without thinking, Draxum gripped the edges of Lou’s suit and slowly pulled them past Lou’s shoulders, exposing more of his slightly scared but tender skin to him. Draxum dipped his head awkwardly before looking Lou in the eyes once more.

Lou’s teeth flashed, possibly enjoying the flustered expression on Draxum’s face, “I knew you liked my chest Drax, no need to feel embarrassed..”

“No it’s not that,” Draxum brushed his fingers lightly over the stiff pecs, trailing a noticeably long scar. “This is new.”

“Oh… I was hoping you wouldn’t notice that,” Lou lowered his voice. “Yeah, some old opponents kinda jumped me in the showers, they really wanted me dead haha.”

Draxum’s head shot up in alarm, “really? Who? Give me their names!”

“It’s fine Draxy, you know me,” Lou laughed, although it was clearly forced, wanting to ease up the tension. “They got one swipe in before I managed to kick their asses. You need to relax Draxy.”

Draxum eyes refused to stray away from Lou’s chest, prompting his partner to guide Draxum’s chin to his own eyes with his fingers.

“I need you to calm down for me, okay?” Lou said softly.

Draxum simply nodded in response, “I was just worried.”

Lou grazed his hand over Draxum’s cheek, prompting the yokai to melt in his hands, “it’s okay Draxum. I still love you.”

Draxum stifled himself from spreading any further. If he had the courage, he would have confessed that Lou’s safety wasn’t something he needed out of love, but of necessity. The world’s greatest fighter dying before his very eyes meant that everything Draxum worked for, was for nothing.

—————————

Large claws gripped the sheets tightly.

Firm hands stroked powerful legs gently.

Nervous gasps and cries of pleasure came out of the scientist’s throat, making noises he didn’t believe were possible.

The scientist bucked, cried and moaned under the human’s strength and force, who was also capable of gingerly holding his lover’s thighs with both hands.

“Lou Jitsu, I love you, I love you so much,”

“I love you too Draxum.”

“Stay with me forever, please.”

“...”

“Lou?”

“I’m not sure Draxum.”

—————————

“Idiot, if you had dove any further you could have lost an arm!”

Draxum bitterly hissed, sitting beside Lou’s bed. The man was nearly covered head to toe with bandages wrapped around his body. Burn scars and other wounds from an infamous Phoenix type yokai. Usually a fire based creature was no match for Lou Jitsu, but suddenly the speed and agility was far too much for the champion. But of course, Draxum knew that wasn’t the case, despite Big Mama’s assertion that it was. Lou was getting reckless, much to the dismay and frustration of Draxum.

How dare he do this to me?

Draxum continued to rant at Lou, not holding back with his biting criticisms. The horror the yokai scientist felt seeing his partner stumble into his arms after a prolonged and bloody battle failed to leave him, even after hours had passed and Draxum was promised that Lou would be safe. Draxum pursued with his angry ranting, raising his voice to punctuate certain points, but the dazed look and the lack of eye contact told him that Lou was barely listening.

“Why don’t you care? What’s wrong with you?” Draxum spat.

Lou tipped his head to glance at Draxum before looking back out of the foggy windows, weakly he lifted his hand and pointed to a young couple carrying their small skeleton-like child out of the hospital, “look at how happy that family is, I bet one of them was allowed to leave early.”

“Are you even listening to me?” Draxum growled.

Lou Jitsu ignored his words and continued, “And that little boy, his father loses his leg but he acts like it’s nothing. It’s sweet.”

“Lou, what’s going on? Why did you screw up that fight?” Draxum gruffly asked.

Lou pulled the sheets and turned over, as if pretending to sleep, which upset Draxum even more.

Standing up he retorted, “don’t ignore me Lou Jitsu! What’s going on?”

After a few minutes of silence, with Draxum unwilling to move from his space, not wanting to leave but not wanting to disrupt the champion, Lou spoke again.

“My father died.”

Draxum’s eyes widened with surprise, “When did this happen.”

Lou was careful with his words, as the next few sentences that came out of him was drowned in venom, “Last month.”

Lou covered his entire body with the blanket, including the face, and continued with a long string of depressed ramblings.

“I didn’t want to tell my family that I was leaving Japan, they would’ve never accepted it, but my father… he caught on,” Lou started, his voice hushed. “He tried to pull me off of that boat and told me I needed to face my destiny. But I didn’t care for that destiny crap! I just wanted to enjoy life for once. We argued in front of all those people, he said some awful things to me, and I spat it all back. Then I hopped on that ship and left. I didn’t even… get a chance to apologize.”

Draxum couldn’t help but crack a smile, “Trashing your father huh? I didn’t know you had it in you.”

“Lou, I didn’t—“

“I really suck Draxum.”

“No you don’t,” Draxum angrily interjected. “You were emotional, you made a bad decision in the moment but that doesn’t change anything. You still love your father and I’m sure your father still loved you.”

“What if I say the worst things to you Draxum?” Lou got up and furrowed his eyes at him, Draxum was surprised to see such intensity coming from the man. “What if I scream and kick at you, what if I tell you that I’ll never wanted to see you again? How would you feel?”

“Well. I’d feel hurt, but I’d still love you,” Draxum cracked a small. He walked over and sat on the edge of Lou’s bed. “I’m sure you’d do the same for me.”

Lou let out a long and rather cruel laugh, cutting off Draxum. He shook his head politely and looked back at Draxum with a surprisingly intense look in his eyes, “no Draxum, if you hurt me in any way, I don’t think I’d ever forgive you.”

————————

“Are you alright?”

“I’m fine.”

“Am I too rough?”

“You’re perfect.”

“That doesn’t answer my question does it?”

“I suppose not.”

“Do you want me to stop? I don’t want to hurt you.”

“No keep going please, and… and touch me a little more.”

“...”

“Is everything—“

“Why were you crying then?”

“I don’t know, I guess I just love you that much.”

“There’s something else isn’t there?”

“...”

“Babe..”

“Nothing to worry about.”

“If you say so…”

“You don’t need to stop. I swear I’m fine.”

“Alright… I just want you to know… I still love you dearly Draxum. And I never want to see you like that again.”

———————————————

Lou was so beautiful when he slept.

Draxum observed his graceful form, how his chest heaved slowly and quietly, how his hair glistened beautifully under the moonlight or how his soft skin have off a heavenly glow. Draxum’s claws traced Lou’s body.

“A human has no right to be this perfect,” Draxum bitterly whispered.

“A handsome yokai like yourself shouldn’t even worry about me,” Lou’s sleepy eyes blinked up to flirt with Draxum.

Draxum quickly put his hands to himself and turned around, but couldn’t ignore how beautiful Lou’s chuckle was, giving off a mix of love and amusement to Draxum’s awkward embarrassment.

——————————

“Why do you love me?” Draxum bluntly asked.

“Because I do, what’s wrong with that?” Lou asked.

“Because you’re Lou Jitsu!” Draxum angrily exclaimed.

Lou’s small eyes widened in surprise before resting again, perhaps not too alarmed given his experience with past fans. But it all just upset Draxum, what gave Lou Jitsu the right to toy with his heart like this. No more dates, no aggressive partying without Draxum, there’s no way in hell he was truly committed to this relationship.

“Tell me right now human,” Draxum hadn’t uttered the word human to Lou in a long time, but he couldn’t help himself. “Do you find it entertaining to hurt me like this? How stupid do you think I am?”

“Pretty darn stupid if you don’t believe a word I’m saying,” Lou snapped a cocky smile. “Do you hate me now?”

“No! I’d never hate you,” Draxum angrily retorted. He didn’t know what to feel at that moment. Lou has offered to take the two of them on a date at a private location, but Draxum felt a strong sense of unease and disgust. He knew his refusal to admit his true feelings was finally getting to Lou Jitsu, with his constant glances, his friendly strokes and his corny banter. 

All cruel and even attempts to lower his guard.

He should have caught on sooner. Lou was spending less and less time with him, and Draxum once caught Lou on the phone with Big Mama, asking her for advice.

How cruel of humans! Draxum bitterly lamented. They take advantage of anyone they love and tear them apart once they find no use of them. I bet Lou Jitsu is planning to kill me, or prevent me from continuing with my plan, that bastard. 

Draxum watched Lou carefully as Lou brought him under a makeshift tree, surrounded by the familiar pink pond set near the center of the city.

“Remember this place?” Lou whispered, staring at his and Draxum’s reflection in the pool.

“We shared our fourth kiss here, but you wanted to call it our first, because it was the first time you ever felt free… correct?” Draxum said, his fists still tight and his eyes still ready on Lou.

“Correct!” Lou beamed, prompting Draxum to try and hide an awkward blush. That bastard has no right having such a perfect smile.

“Well why did you bring me here?” Draxum asked.

“Well we’ve known each other for so long… and…” Lou was struggling to find the words, and Draxum was waiting for him to confess his true feelings. To end it all there. 

Just say it human, Draxum thought bitterly. Admit you’ve been planning a surprise attack on me.

“You said you loved me but… you never clarified, even when I asked,” Lou’s voice was unexpectedly slow for a fast paced action star. “But now I see now, it was my foolishness and refusal to not see what your heart was truly telling me.”

“I don’t like bad poems Lou,” Draxum stepped forward. It was irrational, it was unfair, but he was foolish to pull on this charade for so long and not suspect the human was ready to pounce at any moment.

Lou’s eyes widened and were glazed over, Draxum could see the man struggling to keep his composure.

Am I really scaring him? Has he already figured it out? That I know his plan already?

Draxum noticed Lou’s soft blush and wobbly lips, struggling to find the words to start.

No… that’s not it, is it?

“Draxum… I’ve known you for so long. And in these past several months I don’t think I’ve ever met someone was compassionate, sweet, caring and loving as you,” Lou couldn’t hold back anymore. “Draxum?”

Wiping away his tears, the man slid a hand inside his shirt to pull something out, prompting Draxum to finally give up his facade.

“Lou Jitsu, I know—“

Before Draxum could properly react, Lou grilled his hand, got on one knee, and spouted the five words Draxum thought he’d never hear.

“Draxum, will you marry me?”

——————————

“That’s all we could find sir, I’m sorry,” the yokai Fire Chief responded, looking as upset and forlorn as Draxum was.

Draxum grilled the woman’s shoulders and shook her vigorously “Well you have to keep looking! He has to be under there!”

“We’ve been looking for hours. There’s nothing but this ring left… I’m sorry.”

Draxum peered at the slightly burnt object, remembering how Lou has stated how he had convinced Big Mama to help find the best type of engagement ring for Draxum. It was so beautifully engraved, so finely put together. Just looking at it long enough could leave the yokai in tears.

Just… just like…

Draxum continued barking at the firefighters to keep searching but to no avail. Stating that a fire this massive would be too big for even the great Lou Jitsu to escape from, and yet they failed to find his body anywhere. Draxum wasn’t ready to believe he was dead, not just yet.

Draxum pushed passed the men and women digging through the rubble and attempted to search himself. Looking for remnants of Lou Jitsu, the turtles, anything. He was so desperate. Him wanted him back. He needed him.

Sickeningly crunch was heard and Draxum pulled up the last of the rubble. The large, cartoonish glasses illuminated the floor with its bright, golden colors.

His glasses.

Draxum bent down to pick them up. He stared at them intently, remembering how often Lou spoke about them, treasuring them, loving them, almost as much as he did for Draxum.

Or… perhaps things have changed.

Draxum remembered the burning fury in Lou Jitsu’s eyes. The usually talkative champion lacking the words to explain the amount of rage and betrayal he felt. The same man who spent hours upon hours spilling his deepest, truest feelings for Draxum now refused to utter a single word of affection or even hatred for Draxum.

Draxum remembered the angry yet careful way he held onto the turtles, feeling as though he took them down with them to save them from whatever plan Draxum had.

“Lou Jitsu!” Draxum remembered calling to him. “How could you? After everything I’ve done for you! After all the love and work I’ve put into you! This is how you treat me? I was trying to help you! Help the turtles! Help my kind! Why is this so hard to understand? I did this for you Lou Jitsu! Because I love you!”

Draxum remembered how Lou’s eyes flared up, a level of anger and rage he had never seen before, the kind of warrior he had expected when he originally entered the arena.

Before the flames engulfed him, before the building crashed below, Draxum remembered the final words of his beloved Lou Jitsu.

“You filthy liar.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed the fic! Honestly I loved Draxum being in a loving relationship but is conflicted with the feelings of genuine empathy.

**Author's Note:**

> Wanted to shake things up a bit and write a slightly more fanfic focusing on Lou Jitsu's reaction to the event. I wanted to balance his slight trauma and playful demeanor as well as grappling with his own past and moral decisions


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